Do you think married women REALLY want to know/or care if their husband is cheating on them? If so, who should tell the husband or the mistress?

Given the full array of marriage arrangements now, I’m quite certain this is not a one answer fits all type question. I’m sure given the full spectrum of circumstances, situations, personalities, and expectations the answers would range from most definitely ‘yes’ for some, ‘maybe’ for some, to ‘it depends’ for some, ‘probably not’ for still some others, and even flat out ‘no’ for still some others.

As far as who should tell? Generally speaking, ‘if’ anyone is to tell it should be the husband. For the most part, the ”mistress” stands to gain nothing by “telling” other than possibly vengeance or retribution of some kind. It’s not like she has become altruistic and is suddenly looking out for the best interest of the wife. And even if guilt/repentance has finally taken over and forced her to change her ways that is between her and the Lord. I would suspect that a mistress who decides to “tell” has been, or at least feels, spurned or disrespected in some way and only then decides to lash out and hurt someone else in return.

But as I said there are actually situations that run the full gamut. I can also see situations where the wife and the mistress are close friends or even family… in that case the mistress may be forced to reveal the situation if the husband will not. I’ve seen this between sisters, cousins, neighbors, best friends, co-workers, etc… In situations like these the close proximity means the mistress would have to continue to perpetuate the lie in the face of the offended spouse. The close proximity also raises the likelihood that repeat offenses could occur. This situation, if unresolved, could hinder the mistresses own attempts at redemption, salvation, and moving on. I’ve seen scenarios where the mistress and the wife were much too close to not confess and ask for forgiveness. But without this level of connection, the mistress’ best option is to simply cut all ties and move on without causing any further damage to the marriage.

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